QotW: What would you put in a Mitsubishi theme park?

We recently learned that Mitsubishi is opening a theme park in Japan. While not automotive-themed, we do hope that they include at least some nods to their automotive division’s long history. Why not include a Pajero jungle cruise, Lancer Evolution roller coaster, or Mirage bumper cars? The possibilities are endless. For some reason, the Mitsubishi Group mothership has put you in charge of developing Mitsubishi-land.

What would you put in a Mitsubishi theme park?

The most entertaining comment by next Monday will receive a prize. Scroll down to see the winner of last week’s QotW, “What automatic transmission JNC makes a great driver’s car?“.

When choosing an automatic transmission car it helps temper the disappointment if the car is exceptional in other ways. Ian G.‘s AW11 Toyota MR2 Supercharged certainly was America’s quickest car to 30 mph when it was released. Meanwhile, CycoPablo chose its descendant, the MR2 Spyder with the unique DSG auto and affordable mid-engined roadster fun. On the other end of the spectrum crank_case‘s Z20 Toyota Soarer makes for an excellent grand tourer, and who are we to argue with LJK Setright?

A contingent of absolutists, like Bryan Kitsune, made a stand in the manual or nothing camp. speedie somehow got nearly his entire family to drive stick. ra21benj couldn’t find any good automatics, not even a Porsche.

However, the blow of driving an auto can be softened if the car never came in a stick shift to begin with. CycoPablo‘s Lancer Evo X is a great pick in that regard. Fred Langille and f31roger have found happiness with their own Nissan S-Cargo and Infiniti M30, respectively. Jeremy A. gave a left-field response with a 90s Camry Wagon, an excellent machine in its own right, and Jim Klein redefined the term “driver’s car” with a J80 Land Cruiser.

dankan‘s answer of any car that you can make memories in rang true, but he also acknowledged that one of two other answers should win, and we agree: Mitsubishi Magna‘s choice of the Subaru SVX is an excellent choice and definitely the more accessible one, but Franxou‘s pick of the Mazda Eunos Cosmo narrowly eked out the win due to its triple-rotor power.

The first driver’s car that strikes me as “should have been stick-shifted but only came auto” is the last Mazda Cosmo/Eunos Cosmo from the ’90s. It was an automatic with a manual shift mode, and I get that automatic cars are seen as a bit upmarket, a bit plushier, but… even as a highway bomber, being able to downshift two gears at once and mash the gas is a feeling you will never get from an automatic. It still is a twin-turbo three rotors grand tourer, what more could you ask for?

Omedetou, your comment has earned you a set of decals from the JNC Shop!

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9 Responses to QotW: What would you put in a Mitsubishi theme park?

  1. Lakdasa says:

    You could always leave those weird cars that Jackie Chan drove for Mitsubishi in his films! What about the fastest roller coaster ride in an Evolution? A quick tour around the park in a Pajero Evo. Mitsubishi GTO space car. Colts Mk1s as bumper cars. MItsubishi Zero to scare everyone with them flying KAMIKAZE.

  2. dankan says:

    The mandatory requirement in a Mitsubishi theme park is a large roller coaster/river ride entitled “Corporate Scandal” featuring plunging drops and terrifying curves which leave you in existential fear that regardless of whatever the quality of the thing you are riding in, this set of terrible circumstances might just kill you anyway. I mean, that is the over-arching narrative of of the Mitsubishi story. A company run so badly, making insane mistakes so often, that it was a minor miracle the company survived at all in the car business.

  3. f31roger says:

    No matter what, gotta have Mitsubishi escalators and elevators!

    Definitely the Japanese style toilets!

  4. Jonathan P. says:

    I’m not sure what I’d put in it, but rest assured, the front gate would be a gaint Mitsubishi triple diamond that you would enter through the bottom space in between the two lower diamonds.

  5. brandon says:

    Theme park would have rollercoaster rides with great body styles, bad oversteer and manual boost controllers. They would be called the Talon, the Eclipse and the Laser.
    All of the rides are basically the same….have you grinning ear to ear until they blow up.

  6. Ryan Senensky says:

    They were founded by a samurai so naturally there would have to be samurais.

  7. CycoPablo says:

    Got your swimming trunks/costume?
    Get yourself to the Onsen rapid slide!
    Featuring animatronic Ralliart jumping car…look up as you slide. It’s RIGHT OVER YOU!
    Slide ends with a bubbling water splash.
    Participants follow the exit walkway over a “podium” where a photo will be taken.
    Photo for purchase at adjoining “service tent”.

  8. Streetspirit says:

    a sort of mitsubishi karting experience on a scenic track with different surfaces where instead of regulart karts you have big ChoroQ style minicars designed after mitsubishi highlights.

    I can’t wait to blast down a kart track in a cartoon FTO and risk getting absolutely embarassed by a faster driver in a breadbox of a pajero or L300 van.

    throw in some terrain changes, rally like bits and maybe artifical rain to give that full mitsubishi experience and i’d be sure to get a season pass!

  9. Brett says:

    A race/rally track!

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