It’s the late 70s and the public is clamoring for smaller, efficient cars. Sadly, your portfolio consists of a series of monster land barges where even the smallest offering is several times the size of a Honda Civic. What’s the best way to regain market share?
Smuggle some Mitsubishi Lancers into the country and replace that funny sounding name with a good ol’ American moniker like Dodge Colt! Then show potential customers a 10-minute promo video where you trot out the cheapest gray Datsun B210 you can find and park next to it, in all your striped and vinyl-topped glory. Look, you can even fit two dead bodies tennis rackets in the boot while that Datto swallows just one!
But if you think that’s bad, wait till you see the industrial strength can of whoop ass Dodge opens on domestic competitors like the Chevy Vega, Chevette and Ford Pinto.
Notice also how many of the key features are specifically to help you protect your hard earned petrol. A large fuel tank, to help you avoid long lines at the gas station. A locking fuel door, to ward off pesky thieves with siphons. Yup, we were a nation still smarting from the Oil Crisis.
Thanks to Matt for the tip! [Youtube: OsbornTramain]